Super Funny Christmas Quotes
When it’s almost Christmas, for many of those who solemnize are perhaps ankle-deep in packing latest possible time before the event gifts, party with family and friends and take pictures– leave that, repeal it — but isn’t it worth of reckoning for once what the holiday is actually about?
With having that thing in mind, we turn to some words of festival sagacity pronounced by some folks and what they have to say about the holiday.
These people might be known or unknown to you, care less about this fact and definitely start your cheerful Christmas off with a laugh!
Jon Stewart is an American political humorist who uses ridicule and irony and sarcasm, stand-up comedian, penman and television host. Here comes his funny Christmas quote:
“Christmas and the New Year are actually two holidays. So there is a plural, which in the English language, necessitates the use of ‘s.’ I suppose you could say ‘Merry Christmas’ and ‘Happy New Year,’ but you probably have sh*t to do.” — on Bill O’Reilly’s objection to “Happy Holidays”
This guy is SOMETHING for sure!
Jay Leno, a television host and American stand-up comedian. He strikes with his sheer awesomeness and funny Christmas quotes:
“The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn’t for any religious reasons. They couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin.”
And his awesomeness keeps going on –
“A Christmas shopper’s complaint is one of long-standing.”
Don’t rush! Here some more funny Christmas sayings to make you literally LAUGH OUT LOUD!
Awww! Poor Santa! Still you’ll be same adorable and delightful even after this fun saying!
Ralph Bergengren’s “The Humor of the Colored Supplement” is quite famous among the book lovers! Now what he has to say about Christmas let’s see –
Bill Watterson, an American cartoonist in his comic strip Calvin and Hobbes, expressed quite nicely about Christmas! Surely you’re going to like this one so much!
“Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food, and beer… Who’d have ever guessed that product consumption, popular entertainment, and spirituality would mix so harmoniously?”
W.C. Fields who’s an American funnyman, actor, writer and juggler; what he said on Christmas, just never gets old!
“Christmas at my house is always at least six or seven times more pleasant than anywhere else. We start drinking early. And while everyone else is seeing only one Santa Claus, we’ll be seeing six or seven.”
And this one by Richard Lamm, former Governor of Colorado is just too epical!
“Christmas is a time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell the government what they want and their kids pay for it.”
James Christopher “Jim” Gaffigan is an American actor and stand-up comedian. Now you should put him in the list of Christmas-thinkers as well! This guy seems not to get rusty with his jokes! Ever! Read below to taste his awesomeness once more!
“Ever wonder what people got Jesus for Christmas? It’s like, “Oh great, socks. You know I’m dying for your sins right? Yeah, but thanks for the socks! They’ll go great with my sandals. What am I, German?”
And then, few more quotes about Christmas:
“Three phrases that sum up Christmas are: Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men, and Batteries not included”. – English Proverb
“I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.” By Shirley Temple, child actor and former U.S. ambassador
And this one’s so cute!
“One of the nice things about Christmas is that you can make people forget the past with a present.” By Unknown
And the stream of fun doesn’t end here! Some more to come:
“Christmas just like a day at the office; you do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.”
“Christmas is a spark that ignites in someone’s heart.” By Unknown
“What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
It’s Christmas, Eve!”
“Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.” By Johnny Carson